“We’ve always wanted a balance on this issue, we’ve always asked for this… to allow you as parents to access both sides of this information”
“What we have to decide is what’s the best way for children to stay healthy and that’s what we disagree on and it’s good that we can discuss it”
Meryl Dorey – Woodford Folk Festival, December 29th, 2011
♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣
These are encouraging words from Meryl Dorey suggesting a desire for bipartisan discourse.
Despite these words at Woodford those who have heard the audio or attended know there was no discussion but two presentations. One calm and factual. The other hyped, emotional and fictional.
Having heard Meryl’s new delight in accepting that “it’s good” we can discuss “what we disagree on” because of the importance in deciding “what’s the best way for children to stay healthy”, I assumed she would be delighted to embark upon the realisation of her new hunger for discourse.
A Silent – Defender of The Silence
It seems I was mistaken.
Since the excitement of Woodford I’ve sent Meryl two emails, tweets and invitations on Facebook.
There has been no reply. The Silence has fallen.
You see it appears Meryl and I disagree. Meryl said to a live audience that’s it’s good we can discuss it. Apparently the reality is far from that claim.
Others, as recently as tonight, have kindly raised this point during other online discussions with Meryl. Meryl was in full flight denying that her critics read “medical information” which prove her point and instead rely on “corrupt” studies.
Meryl had her attention drawn to her so-called debate forum. Then to my request. It seemed she wants to convey she had the last word:
This is not debate – this is propaganda.
But as seen below, Meryl did receive a reply. She refused to publish it. Censorship, again. Then, Silence! No reply. No riposte. No denial. Just… Silence.
From: Paul Gallagher Subject: My personal request of Meryl Dorey Date: 5 January 2012 2:34:18 PM AEDT To: meryl@avn.org.au
Hi Meryl,
I hope this finds you well and easing back into the swing of things for 2012.
I just thought I’d touch base to be sure you’ve seen my extended invitation to your good self, to post or send a riposte to my claims about your pertussis statistics analysis.
You may have seen it on ABC News Breakfast’s Facebook page yesterday – twice – and also on Stop AVN’s Facebook page.
The offer to debunk the entire lot or just tackle a few pointers is still standing.
I imagine that the inability to debunk the key elements, might require on your part, some rather powerful argument/s were you to then continue to maintain your present stance on pertussis vaccination as a variable in pertussis notification. Particularly the oft’ cited large increase in 20 years, consonant with a 25% increase in childhood vaccination.
Below I show this to be false, fatally flawed and irredeemable as an argument.
It may thus follow that a retraction of your position on pertussis may be the next accepted step should you fail to adequately address these major points.
If some of your points can be sustained then only a partial retraction in your media release would be needed.
Finally, I would firmly suggest that no reply is an admission of failure and acceptance of my position in total as outlined below.
A directly contrary response is not acceptable.
A reply broaching other areas of pertussis vaccination – such as mutations in the MT27 and MT70 strains of B. pertussis – unrelated to the content below is also not acceptable.
I invite you only to address the material below.
If any points are unclear, then please don’t hesitate to drop me a line.
I eagerly look forward to your reply and/or a reasoned debunking of my position as outlined below (what was outlined below was of course this text from a previous post).
Many thanks,
Kind Regards, Paul Gallagher [personal email supplied]
But nothing happened. The only punctuation was the horrible Silence. Just…. Silence!
Next came the postVaccine induced autism: How Meryl Dorey misled her Woodford audience.
I knew Meryl had read it. It was on Facebook too. Surely now something would happen. Something, anything to break that suffocating Silence. It filled my ears. It bounced off the walls. It woke me at night, mocking me with quiet neighbours and no faulty car alarms. Oh how I longed for the good old days. To be called “pond scum” for no reason, just like Meryl used to was my fantasy.
Two beautiful words to shatter the Silence. Pond Scum. Glorious Pond Scum. It was the oasis to my desert. The shooting star to my blackened night sky. The Betadine to my Tinea.
Then came the story of doctors sending away unvaccinated children. The measles cases. Parents refusing to vaccinate because their fears of autism were fuelling measles. I was seized by an idea. Crazy I know. Insane maybe. But I could take this Silence… this madness, no longer. I offered Meryl Double Or Nothing. Yes, yes, oh God forgive me I did it. Prove the autism argument wrong and I’d forget about the pertussis argument. That’s right! Win one fallacy and get another entirely ridiculous fallacy free. No cost. No strings. Just stop the Silence! I posted on Facebook, a shattered, shameful wreck:
It was met with… Silence! That was it. I was sure I would go insane. Insaner. As I lay tossing throughout the night enveloped in the cruel Silence a misty apparition appeared and through it stepped the most powerful Vaccine Myth of all time. Sir Vaccines Cause Autism, Knight of The Realm of Mythology stood before me. I fell to my knees weeping and trembling. “I am not worthy”, I mumbled. “I have failed to protect your very Mythness”.
“Oh bollocks, Old Bean… may I?”, he offered as he lay back on my bed with a long sigh. “Now how about you pop on the kettle, fire up the computer and play the audio of Meryl’s Woodford speech. Nothing regenerates us dead and non existent Myths like…”.
“The Power of The Burning Stupid!”, I finished, fumbling with the keyboard until I heard the ghastly sound itself.
Over a cup of Earl Grey Sir Vaccines Cause Autism regenerated on The Burning Stupid and reminded me of what I knew all too well. The very existence of Vaccine Myths in The Realm of Mythology depends upon frequent retelling as Myths.
Any attempt to force their ontology toward reality with junk science and bogus claims was just as deadly for them as it appeared to be for us. Apparently he felt we were doing a good job. After reading Meryl’s Woodford slides, and laughing heartily over a few blog and Facebook posts, he stood up.
“Anymore Burning Stupid and I’ll be blind” he joked. “Now, here’s what you need to do dear chap. First, ignore the Silence. The more Silence you hear the more proof they have nothing to say. Do not fear the Silence for it is a sign of your victory and their cowardice. These creatures feed on angst, insult and repetition.
They define their puny worth by pretending to be in a battle with imaginary forces and without good folk to slander, would be lost. Have your say and be done with it. They are trolls, and we do not feed the trolls.
Tomorrow, follow up with another Facebook post to this Dorey woman. The next day an email and a tweet. I bet twenty bags of gold and 1,000 horses she will remain silent. She is already defeated. Hit her with facts. Facts are their enemy and their worst nightmare.
They will cower, cringe, lie and cry foul like the spineless creatures they really are. Never waver! Stop The AVN!”, he finished brandishing his sword, slicing my curtains in half and demolishing the veneer on my wardrobe.
“Farewell! Mwahaha. Mwahahaha”, he added dramatically before walking face first into my balcony door and falling back ungraciously.
“Sorry, that’s shatter-proof glass”, I pointed out. “Obviously in need of a clean and thus, looking just like your mist cloud which is actually over there”.
“I knew that!”, he said straightening his crown. “Very well. Mwaha, Tally Ho, you get the idea…”. And with that, he was gone.
So the next day I set about ignoring the silence, and posted on Facebook:
Then the next day, I set about emailing:
From: Paul Gallagher Subject: Woodford autism/vaccines problem Date: 13 January 2012 11:54:43 AM AEDT To: meryl@avn.org.au
Hi Meryl,
I trust this finds you well.
After listening to your Woodford presentation on autism and checking your slides it appears a number of gross errors were made, particularly concerning Bailey Banks.
The court ruling specifically states Bailey does not have autism. Indeed PDD is not autism – something that is basic knowledge.
I have significant concerns that you claimed his ruling supported your case of vaccine induced autism when this is not the case. Indeed the index page of the ruling clearly states, “Non-autistic developmental delay”.
On page 7, Dr. Lopez (acting for Mr. Banks) stated that “Bailey does not have autism because he has a reason for his deficits.”
Added to this are many other quotes also dismissing autism as a diagnosis, and I am concerned you have read these yet intentionally misled the audience.
Furthermore, the 83 VICP cases you cite are also not related to autism beyond the clumsy attempt by Pace Law School students under the auspices of vaccine scare profiteer, Mary Holland to argue “autism like symptoms” (despite having a clear aetiology) are in fact autism.
Only 21 reported cases were sourced from the VICP files. The other 62 phone interviews and communication questionnaires with biased parties, were not verified nor had ethics approval.
This leaves a total of zero cases. More so your slide only claims “associated” with, and the Pace School media rep’ Danielle Orsino has only ever argued a “suggestion”.
All in all, there is no evidence in your presentation to suggest a remote link between vaccines and autism.
Kind Regards, Paul Gallagher [personal email supplied]
And then sent this tweet:
Of course, as predicted there has been nothing but Silence! Then tonight Meryl Dorey excelled herself, proving what Sir Autism had said. They feed on repetition, insult, angst and are cowards with no evidence and no real purpose beyond insulting well meaning folk.
Tracey from Stop The AVN had caught Meryl out on her own blog, making false claims in a superior tone:
Meryl either agreed that she was indeed “proved wrong” or was simply unable to offer a cogent reply. She ignored every point and answered:
Tracey responds, yet strangely her comment still awaits moderation. The perpetual complainer of free speech suppression is still, as ever, hard at work censoring the truth. Tracey has generously mentioned my first request of Dorey.
Apart from the above, with some retweets there have been a few mentions on Facebook. Meryl Dorey has probably had over a dozen opportunities in as many days to acknowledge this. Presently her lack of words are answering all my queries.
In public Meryl seemingly wants to be seen to be legitimate, gushing pleasantly about discussion for the benefit of others. Take her up on this and the Silence remains. The persecution returns. There appears to be only one person Dorey wants to benefit. Despite the obvious humour that hovers over this patently ridiculous spectacle, there is no long term joke. Children get sick and die, AVN members are schemed out of money and Aussies are being misled time and again. But “it’s good that we can discuss it”.
As the clock ticked toward midnight a couple of nights back I received a knock on the door from a very strange character indeed.
Standing on the door step was a heavily robed individual whose face was completely shadowed by a large hood. A cloud of foggy mist seemed to hang about his personage (I assumed it was male), along with a strong moldy smell and for a moment I was lost for words. All that was lacking to fit the role of Death, was the scythe. He thrust forward a rolled parchment tied in strands of old rope and sealed with a bright red wax seal.
I peered at the seal which seemed to read Castle Cockamaymee, then back at the visitor. He nodded at the parchment and extended an arm with a huge sleeve from which poked a cadaverous finger. He wiggled it as if to say get on with it so I broke the seal and the rope strands fell away. I unrolled it and with growing delight read the text:
Dear Paul,
You are invited to Vaccine Myths New Year Celebrations at our stronghold in Middle Earth.
Your guide Byron, has entered through one of our temporary trans-dimensional space time portals to hand you this invitation. Please feel welcome to follow him back through said portal, at which point you will arrive at your destination.
Venue: Realm of Mythology’s Castle Cockamaymee, Middle Earth.
Time: Meaningless.
Byron? Anyway…
It was signed by all nine vaccine ringwraiths, led of course by Sir Vaccines Cause Autism and Vaccines Contain Mercury. Slayed by Dr. Rachie with Science at the momentous Battle of Castle Mamamia they had since regenerated many times. Then there was a host of other signatures including the deep impression left by the powerful hand of Big Pharma Myth. I was particularly pleased to see Improved Living Standards Wiped Out Disease in a steady hand. Last I’d seen of him was on October 25th just before Meryl Dorey’s Supercalifragilistichomeoprophylaxis Tour of W.A. He was quite unwell and eventually collapsed a shrivelled, dead husk starved of proper retelling and poisoned by attempts to support him with pseudoscience.
Vaccine Myths are, to state the obvious, myths. It is through the telling of these Myths and belief in them that they source their life essence: The Power of the Burning Stupid. Attempts to turn a myth into reality through bogus means and false claims of evidence is disastrous. More than any other Myth, Improved Living Standards has struggled with attempts to nail him down with junk science. Mainly antivaxxers using reduced mortality figures that followed improvement in sanitation to fallaciously claim a drop in disease itself. Bogus, doctored graphs needlessly tacked onto a retelling have taken their toll over and again. More than a few times skeptics have saved him from oblivion.
Of course Vaccine Myths can be regenerated at any time, provided human beings radiate enough Burning Stupid and retell the specific Myth. What we here tend to call lying. I could certainly hazard a guess or two at where Improved Living Standards had sourced the Burning Stupid to regenerate. Usually philosophical about this, Vaccine Myths will fight for their survival against what they call “broken humans”, who are those antivaxxers we deem completely insane. Broken Humans are void of the Burning Stupid tending to radiate pure malignancy along with copious amounts of deadly bogus “evidence”.
For these reasons Vaccine Myths, which technically don’t exist, resemble long-dead, recently exhumed medieval knights, armed to the teeth but with delightfully unique personalities. Having chatted quite a bit with Sir Vaccines Cause Autism, I’ve become rather fond of his calm, capable, non confrontational approach to things. As I followed Byron toward a misty cloud a few meters down the road I reflected on Autism’s impeccable manners and suave disposition.
Knighted for services to the Realm of Mythology in sustaining the Power of The Burning Stupid, he was quite embarrassed about all the fuss, preferring to keep on with his huge workload. Fiercely dismissive of false myths and an outspoken critic of Meryl Dorey he’d been kind enough to outline to complexity that goes into choosing a new Vaccine Myth or a simple Lie. Byron reached the mist, turned and beckoned with his finger in the universal language “Follow”, then promptly disappeared. I stepped into the mist expecting a sort of Star Gate experience.
Yet within a step I was standing in sunshine a few feet from an enormous wooden gate reinforced with steel bands and studs that rose hundreds of feet above me. I thought FaceTime was cool, but Space Time had advantages. To my right and left huge hewn stone walls, much higher the the gate followed the terrain for thousands of meters. It was topped with battlements, some of which protruded outwards in arcs for 30 meters or so, dotted with huge merlons, watchtowers, archery and observation decks. Massive iron framework could be seen attached at strategic intervals the purpose of which was lost on me, beyond exploiting gravity for some hellish bone crushing, brain splattering, boiling oil spilling purpose.
Thousands of arrow loops and rectangular ports dotted the wall. Deceptively small, I knew from ancient castles and defensive walls in our dimension that each opened into a huge funicular recess running through the wall giving archers ample room to move and depending on height hundreds of square meters of target range. All this for protection against the many Enemies of Reason, Sir Vaccines Cause Autism had once explained to me. Dark forces here were devoted to turning Myths into perceived reality with junk science thus ushering in the Age Of Darkness.
Their minions – slaves and soldiers – looked for want of a better description, like Orcs. I looked around and was amazed to see hundreds of corpses in various states of decay and dismemberment. It was close to freezing and patches of snow and ice lay across the ground. They could have been here for days or months. These Orc-like creatures were similar but could be discerned by uniforms under their armour. Antivaxxers dressed like Andrew Wakefield and were endowed with large silicon breasts like Jenny McCarthy and tangled, unwashed hair like Meryl Dorey. They had accents like Viera Scheibner. Many had monkey heads and wings. A rotting sign lay near a flying monkey corpse. It read “Open ze gate or zoon you vill be drownink in de mercuree”.
Chiropractors and reflexologists wore white coats and used large shields with anatomical signs and impossibly dumb claims on them. Creationists carried bananas, rode giant crockoducks and had hair like Baptist ministers. TCM practitioners had Rhino horns protruding from their heads and carried bags of useless herbs. Acupuncturists had needles protruding from their hideous faces which they probably plucked out and shot with tiny little cross bows that they carried. I lost count of how many corpses were dressed like the Pope and covered in Holy Bling. The Aura readers wore psychedelic robes. Crystal healers shot crystals with sling shots. New Age diagnosticians were clad in flashing LED’s and meaningless printouts. Theta healers reputedly frowned at the walls and yelled “Quantum” periodically.
The homeopath soldiers were the most pathetic though. They supposedly spread themselves so thinly it was impossible to detect any. Rather than attacking the defences they believed they could win by attacking themselves in small doses. The smaller the more deadly. Some would cut off a finger or gouge out an eye. Highly trained veterans might sprain an ankle. Their Elite Forces attacked in groups of one brandishing a shaving cut. They believed just a memory of them attacking was sufficient to get results.
Looking at these corpses and carnage, the more I thought about it the more I realised it was a perfect analogy to our own struggle between science and woo. Uncaring beneficiaries misled wave after wave of misguided but loyal minions who then suffered the real consequences. Eventually Byron flicked his finger at the gate as if to say get on with it (again) then wandered off down along the wall, nimbly hurdling the disproportionate armour covered breasts of a prostrate antivaxxer corpse. Just then a small door opened in the gate and I wandered inside.
It was an incredible spectacle. An entire medieval city faded into the distance in a display of colour, architecture, sound and smell. An elderly cadaverous looking gentleman standing nearby introduced himself as Butter is good for burns, and said he’d guide me to the Ballroom, situated in the original Castle Cockamaymee. As we walked along winding pathways he pointed out the various Halls of The Realm of Mythology. Each alternative to medicine was separately represented here as an “alternative medicine” Myth.
The Divinity Campus was huge, encompassing countless Myths and staff. Butter is good for burns informed me that a recent addition in the Creationist Myth faculty was an entire building devoted to tackling Intelligent Design. This bogus “evidence” threatened Mythical retelling and thus the various Creation Myths themselves. Apparently however the sheer power of the Burning Stupid given off by those who accepted ID was unprecedented. Divinity scholars were hard at work researching exactly what was best for Myths.
Butter also made a point of telling me that Theta and Quantum Healing were new faculties not heard of “back in my day”. He said that with such finality that I assumed he may not have long left. Eventually we came to a building large enough to be called a castle in it’s own right.
No doubt the original Castle Cockamaymee around which the city of Castle Cockamaymee had grown. Huge walls and a large slope, now covered in grass testified to it’s original defensive purpose. Butter led me up a huge winding staircase that went on and on crossing huge galleries, passing cavernous hallways and massive doors.
Eventually we seemed to reach the top and he used a huge steel knocker to bang on the door, then excused himself heading off downstairs.
A moment later the door swung open and I was greeted by what I assumed was a younger relative of Sir Vaccines Cause Autism. Just as I recognised the familiar weapons and medals of gallantry he announced, “Ah, wonderful wonderful and well met young Paul. Delighted you could come. Do come in dear chap. Things are just getting under way”, he beckoned with a flourish of his robed arm.
I was astonished. Rather than the usual mummified corpse, he looked quite fresh. Almost alive. “Thank you Sir Vaccines…“.
“Just Autism, dear chap. We can dispense with titles also. Now don’t be too surprised at the state of everyone’s regeneration. There’s been quite a bit of Vaccine Myth retelling at your end and loads of the Burning Stupid. What with the reaction to the immunisation incentives, followed by Dorey on radio, upheld complaints, followed by more interviews before that Woodford business and then the Woodford Festival itself, we’re jumping out of our skin. And it just keeps coming. Delightful! Now come and say hello to…”.
Before he could finish a voice yelled out “Paulie, Paulie, Paulie!”, and a tanned fellow dressed in tennis gear came hurdling furniture and dodging party goers toward us. As he came up I could recognise Improved Living Standards, Not Vaccination Wiped Out Disease. I couldn’t believe this was the same dead and shrivelled husk from a few weeks back.
“Thank Stupidity for Judy Wilyman and Meryl Dorey. Look at what Wilyman wrote to Nicola Roxon following the Immunisation Incentive change in late November”, he gushed excitedly. This is point one in her letter – point one!”. He held up his iPhone and I read:
There is no historical evidence that vaccines controlled any of the infectious diseases listed in government immunization policies – in any developed country.
“It even sounds a bit ambiguous but I’m the only Myth that comes close… and we know it’s one of her core beliefs, so Bam I was on my feet in no time. Then it kept getting retold and believed over and over again. Then Dorey said the same thing on Facebook trying to use the mumps outbreak as proof and then next she’s on 3CR before Woodford. Listen to this!”, he offered passing me the ear buds and tapping his iPhone screen. Sure enough, there was Dorey’s voice saying:
A lot of the credit that’s been given to vaccines for the decline in deaths and infectious diseases has nothing to do with vaccines. Because it all happened before the shots were introduced. Engineers did more to improve the health of Australians than doctors ever have.
“And of course, this is all in the governments own data she reckons. It’s awesome. I’m thinking of changing my name to Engineers did more to improve the health of Australians than doctors ever have, but it’s a bit long. Oh! I mixed it up with some rap also, so I can groove around the place. Have a listen”:
“Anyway, tonight I’m gunna party like it’s 1899”, he laughed. With that he high fived me, and boogied back into the party crowd. Autism smiled and said, “He’s been like that for days now but will soon calm down. Vaccines Contain Mercury is anxious to catch up. He’ll be by the fire if I know him. The nights get pretty chilly around here”. On the way down we bumped into Vaccines Have Never Been Tested chatting with My Child’s Immune System Will Be Overwhelmed. They introduced their lady friend Vaccine Lies as High Pitched Crying and Hepatitis B Vaccine Kills. All looked in great health and we spent some time discussing the intricacies of vaccine testing and the many hundreds of immune system insults children get each day just from putting hands in mouths and going about their business.
My Child’s Immune System Will Be Overwhelmed wasn’t looking his usually nervous self. Autism explained that this was because meningococcal C, pneumococcal and varicella would be part of the full immunisation assessment from July 2013 and that MMR would be replaced with Priorix-Tetra, a quadrivalent vaccine for measles, mumps, rubella and varicella. So whilst the Myth itself was still pathetic, Overwhelmed wasn’t taking it personally and expected quite a lot of retelling. Plus Dorey was on air recently now claiming children receive 50 vaccines before school. We mingled on chatting with the crowd, enjoying the fare. By now the party was in full swing.
Infectious Diseases Are Harmless and Children Should Get Them and his friend Vaccines Actually Cause The Infectious Disease They Should Prevent had no doubt had a few wines, but were engrossed in a fascinating philosophical discussion. Antivaxxers believed in both Myths. Thus, if Diseases Are Harmless (even good as many claimed) was believed then surely there could be no problem with Vaccines Cause Disease – quite the opposite in fact. Similarly, if Vaccines Cause Disease was believed, then this was a bonus for the belief in Diseases Are Harmless or Good. By logical extension on one hand, if children were meant to get the diseases, then vaccines would be the surest way to reach this goal.
On the other hand, if vaccines causing disease was a reason to not vaccinate then this denied the children from wonderful diseases such as “Melanie’sMarvellous Measles“. Clearly they seemed to cancel each other out. Which couldn’t be true as they were both here in the Realm of Mythology, existing under the power of frequently told Myths. A large crowd had gathered around following the discussion intently. They told us the two had already discussed whether one Myth was more mythical than the other, or if one could possibly cancel out the other slightly more.
Scribbled on a piece of parchment was the famous 60 Minutes statement. “So, vaccines are dangerous, and diseases are good”, to which Viera Scheibner had answered “Exactly”. They’d decided that as each Myth made up an equal half of this statement and it was “exact” in an antivaxxers thinking it was proof they were equally valid. Which brought them back to square one. Now they were discussing the impact of human stupidity, posing various ways it might be measured. Sir Vaccines Caused Autism looked on with pride and whispered, “They’re doing well… for non-existent entities of course. Once they work out that human stupidity is infinite and can’t be measured they’ll soon have their answer – even if it takes weeks. Er.., no offence of course dear chap”.
“None taken my friend, none taken”, I replied quietly. “Once they work it out I imagine they’ll be just as shocked as delighted at the sheer glare of the Burning Stupid”. We started to move away as Autism grinned and almost bumped into a magnificently regal and ancient looking character. He took a step back, removed a large hat and offered a sweeping bow speaking in what sounded like a German dialect. Viennese? Austrian? A bit of both? Could it possibly be..?
“Ah Paul”, offered Autism, “May I present my good friend and Peer of The Realm, Sir Water Has A Memory, who holds a similar position to mine in the faculty of Homeopathic Myths”.
Gobsmacked for a moment, I stared at his deep blue vest and purple cape, both etched with golden thread then at the glittering jewels on his sword handle, scabbard, belt and fingers. Eventually I composed myself and managed a bow of sorts. Memory offered a few pleasantries in English and at that moment a younger looking Myth wandered up. “Excellent, excellent I hoped you’d be nearby”, Autism said to him. “Paul may I introduce Homeoprophylaxis, one of our few dual faculty members here at Castle Cockamaymee“.
Homeoprophylaxis shook my hand and extended a warm welcome in a Cuban accent. We stood about chatting and laughing at human stupidity for a while. Both Memory and Homeoprophylaxis were very keen to find out about the progress of the bogus claim that Quantum Physics would one day explain homeopathy. They were delighted to know their Mythical status was not only quite safe but that Theta and Quantum healers had now started using the same excuse. We left them dancing a jig and singing in Cuban and Viennese.
Before I knew it we’d made it to the fire place, which was roughly the size of a garage door. Lounging about in chairs were Vaccines Contain Mercury, Vaccines Contain Toxic Ingredients and Vaccines Don’t Work Because Kids Still Get The Disease, and a host of female Lies. One gracious looking mummified female wandered over and Sir Vaccines Cause Autism introduced her as his wife the good Lady Pervasive Developmental Disorder Is The Same As Autism. No doubt Lady PDD had copped a large dose of regenerative vibes from Woodford, and looked almost as fit as her husband.
Vaccines Contain Mercury seemed to be holding Court over the group, many of whom were toking on a large hookah pipe he kept topping up with hashish and cannabis. Known for his signature reefer Mercury took the view that being dead and non-existent must allow for some vices. He gave me a laid back wave. “I see you met old Shit and Sugar“, he said to laughter referring to Sir Water Has A Memory. “But seriously – lovely chap and dearly loved he is. Come and join us. We’re just discussing topics for this years AGM. My Children’s Immune System Will Be Overwhelmed looks set for a new workload and young Pertussis over there (I waved to a new face) is certain to be approved by the committee as a new Myth. The only issue is which Myth. Bad Cough? Vaccine doesn’t work? Vaccine causes pertussis? Vaccine kills babies? Man, it’s enough to do ya head in”.
Just then a cheer went up and we counted down to midnight. As soon as the cheering, back slapping and kissing of mummified corpses finished a slow chant began. “Pharma, Pharma, Pharma…“, it continued until the muscular and armored physique of Big Pharma Myth leaped on top of a table to thunderous applause.
He was holding a microphone in his massive hand and from somewhere the tune of Mary Poppins’ Chim Chim Cher-ee came from an amplifier.
I joined in the applause as I realised what was going on. Big Pharma had toured with Meryl Poppins during the Supercalifragilistichomeoprophylaxis Tour of W.A. singing the Conspira Conspira Conspira-see duo. He waited for the right moment then started singing in his baritone voice:
Conspira, conspira, conspira-see – I’m evil and wicked and quite darstardlee
Conspira, conspira, conspira-roo – Bad luck will rub off, when I shake ‘ands with you
We tells you people we do things so pure – But in truth we hide, the real cancer cure
Conspira, conspira, conspira-see – You take all my drugs, I take your money
Flying about in me luxury jet – I pull the lever, and it’s chemtrails you get
We seem to work very ‘ard, travelling miles – But in truth we are, shape shifting reptiles
Conspira, conspira, conspirasee – I am just a slave to Malignancy
We tell you we do lots of randomised trials – But just sit around and twiddle some dials
Our ads and our packets are all really slick – But it’s all just designed to keep people sick
Everybody! Conspira, conspira, conspirasee…
Soon the whole place was jumping and different Myths and Lies took turns with the microphone. At one point I found myself dancing with Vaccines Contain Mercury who, reefer in hand, seemed to have mastered a style that combined Square dancing with trying to stamp out spot fires. A few good natured sword fights broke out but of course no-one could get hurt. Improved Living Standards was back dressed in traditional garb thoroughly enjoying himself. I was particularly impressed with the voice of one young Vaccine Lie who I later found out was Doctors Don’t Report Adverse Reactions. She had the crowd in the palm of her hand. Homeoprophylaxis himself looked smitten as she sang:
Supercalifragilistichomeoprophylaxis
If you say it loud enough you ignore there is no praxis
Um diddle diddle diddle um diddle ay
Um diddle diddle diddle um diddle ay
Supercalifragilistichomeoprophylaxis
When your patients are all dead blame oxygen atom’s axis
Um diddle diddle diddle um diddle ay
Um diddle diddle diddle um diddle ay….
Slowly the night wore on and morning was approaching. I spent the better part of an hour chatting with Autism and Mercury about their early years together. It was easy to see why they were such firm friends. Mercury was furious about Dorey’s recent attempts to promote bogus and fraudulent nonsense to argue vaccines actually do cause autism. “It’s not just you”, he stressed to his friend, “But Lady PDD’s ontology has now been openly threatened by that ridiculous travelling side show”.
“I’m quite fine and so is my good wife and you know how I feel about fuss”, replied Autism. “Which reminds me, we have a sunrise breakfast to share. Paul, it’s been a pleasure once again. You simply must come back for the AGM dear chap, and no I won’t hear of any excuse. We do have time portals after all. How was the journey over? We thought you’d prefer it to our usual choice of coffin or sarcophagus”.
“Awesome… I mean, very comfortable. Quite suitable”.
“Wonderful then. It’s almost time for you to leave, so until next time I’ll be off and bid thee both farewell”, said Autism embracing Mercury in a brotherly hug. With that he headed for a side door and was gone. Mercury was rolling up another reefer and nodded toward the balcony door. I bade farewell all those who were still around (Big Pharma almost broke my hand in a bone crushing shake) and followed Mercury out into the freezing air. “So, what do ya think of the pace?”, he asked.
Words failed me. The sun was coming up and the view was magnificent. It stood to reason that as this was the original castle it was on the highest ground, giving an extraordinary view of the city below. Off in the distance I could see snow covered mountains. On the walls guards patrolled with one or two shooting an arrow or releasing some flaming debris from a catapult.
“It’s breath taking. Never seen anything like it. Is there some sort of battle or war or…?”.
“Battle?!”, Mercury sounded shocked. Nah. Just business as usual. Man, when there’s a battle they’re piled five deep down there. During the warmer months. Now we’re just keepin’ ’em honest as usual. Poor buggers – you’ve seen the different types, yeah? Dyin’ for every stupid pile of bat shit nonsense known to Myth. Lied to by the scum riddled creatures who dream up this madness and hope to profit from it”.
“Sounds familiar”, I replied.
“Indeed. And without you guys who knows what could happen here. Seriously dude. Give our regards to all at Stop The AVN and all the others standing up for science and reason. The more rational your world, the safer The Realm of Mythology. We’re in your debt… what with us not actually technically existing and all. But a Fact is a Fact and a Myth is a Myth. I think the universe prefers it that way”, he said gazing distantly at the sunrise. I was about to agree but thought better of it. Things seemed quite perfect for a moment.
Soon we noticed Byron hovering around a cloud of mist. “Ah. Here’s your ride”, joked Vaccines Contain Mercury. He shook my hand and slapped my on the shoulder. I wandered up to the mist. Byron pointed at my pockets and at the side of his head with his bony finger. Oh! I realised he meant keys, wallet, phone…
“Yes, all good”, I said. Byron nodded and stepped back out of my way. I turned to look back at the heavily armed semi-mummified knight.
“It’s been real man”, Vaccines Contain Mercury said pointing at me with two fingers clasping what was left of his huge reefer.
With that I stepped into the mist and vanished from the Realm of Mythology and the best non existent party I’d never been to.
Even though the sound of it Is something quite atrocious If you say it loud enough You’ll always sound precocious Um diddle diddle diddle um diddle ay Um diddle diddle diddle um diddle ay
Meryl Dorey of the Australian Vaccination Network hasn’t been her usual fun loving self since returning from her W.A. 2011 Tour.
Things, it would appear, did not go to plan. It was supposed to have been all so simple. Meryl Poppins was going to float in with her carpet bag of all singing all dancing vaccine myths and in just 15 days tear up the stage in an extravaganza of adoration over a very special seven performance tour.
All of W.A. would turn out to hear one of Australia’s most loved fairy tales. Toils and struggles of the real world would be left behind for two weeks as fantasy and magic came to town. Scarred, battered and exhausted from the toxins in vaccines, this is just what this entire state of sickly people needed.
The favourites were eagerly anticipated.
Supercalifragilistichomeoprophylaxis, would have the kiddies tongue tied and flushed.
The delightful song and dance duo with Big Pharma Myth Conspira Conspira Conspira-see would have the adults on their feet. And everyone of course would sing along to Just A Spoonful of Oscillococcinum.
Step Back In Time with backing vocals from the very talented myths, Diseases Are Harmless and Vaccines Cause Disease were billed as “mind blowing”. For the totally unvaccinated, Meryl planned to team up with Diseases Provide Immunity and finish each show with the moving favourite that any parent can sing to kids, Stay Alive. She would be loved, adored by the media and interviewed at length on air.
But things seemed to go wrong almost immediately. Channel 10 withdrew sponsorship of The Conscious Living (or Lying) Expo after seeing Meryl Dorey’s name on the list. She summoned the Flying Monkeys. She published a piece on Dr. Peter Dingle who was there presenting his Great Cholesterol Myth. This conspiracy theory is a favourite of David Icke, so Meryl was certainly in good company. Dorey – self appointed defender of free speech – then spent two lengthy pieces on her blog whining about Liberal MP Barry Haase for having his say in defence of vaccines – below. Dorey twice more summoned the Flying Monkeys.
In a rushed round up, Meryl Dorey herself reported on the “smallish groups” to turn out to the Meryl Poppins shows. Despite billing herself as a “vaccine expert” Dorey was completely lost when it came to the rubella vaccine in Australia. In a piece that sounds half made up Dorey recounts testimonials from nameless people. At one of her shows Dorey spoke with a midwife who told her of a 22 week pregnant woman who was found to have low rubella antibodies “so her doctor just gave her a rubella vaccine on the spot”.
Here’s why you should never listen to Meryl Dorey and why her misplaced confidence and immediate conclusions are potentially dangerous.
First of all, rubells (sic) is only a risk for women in their first trimester of pregnancy (the first 12 weeks) so there was no need to panic about rubella levels for someone who was already 22 weeks pregnant.
According to The Australian Immunisation Handbook, regarding rubella:
The risk of damage declines to 10 to 20% by 16 weeks’ gestation. After this stage of pregnancy, fetal damage is rare but has been reported up to 20 weeks’ gestation.
Meryl Dorey:
Second, this vaccine has never been tested for safety during pregnancy and except in the case of an emergency, it should not be used at that time.
The need for… rubella vaccination should be assessed as part of any pre-conception health check. Although the use of most vaccines during pregnancy is not usually recommended on precautionary grounds, there is no convincing evidence that pregnancy should be an absolute contraindication to the use of any vaccine, particularly inactivated vaccines.
Meryl Dorey:
Last, there IS no rubella vaccine in Australia – there hasn’t been for ten years or more since the monovalent rublla(sic) vaccine, Meruvax, was withdrawn and rubella is now only available as part of the combined MMR shot. This woman was vaccinated without being given any of this information and was told outright that she was getting a monovalent vaccine when in fact, she received a three-in-one shot!
Rubella vaccine is available as either MMR vaccine or as a monovalent rubella vaccine. Monovalent rubella vaccine: Meruvax II – CSL Biotherapies/Merck & Co Inc (rubella virus vaccine).
I’ll wage good money you can keep returning to Meryl’s post to read, “This woman was vaccinated without being given any of this information and was told outright that she was getting a monovalent vaccine when in fact, she received a three-in-one shot!” for a long, long time. Wrong, wrong, wrong and making up stories. That’s our Meryl.
Then there’s an assumption another person was “misinformed”. Needing a tetanus shot the woman was offered the ADT Booster which has diptheria and tetanus toxoid, or dTap which is diptheria, tetanus and pertussis. You can read the Immunisation Handbook on tetanus here. The woman seems to remember being offered “tetanus and pertussis” which doesn’t exist. Even Dorey realises the potential for patient confusion, but we get:
Whether she misunderstood what she had been offered or the staff member had no idea what was in the vaccine, I’m not sure. But if she had been misinformed, it would not have been the first (or hundredth) time someone had told me a similar story.
Yes, yes indeed. Just like the rubella story above.
Hepatitis B vaccine is to be administered within 72 hours of birth, but Meryl heard from a nurse it is being given as early as 10 minutes. There is no issue here but Dorey seems to think it should be given “three days later”. To make this more absurd, information on the HBV vaccine being given within 72 hours of birth is available on the AVN website. Oh, Meryl!
She also spoke to someone representing someone else who Dorey claims has Guillain-Barre Syndrome. Apparently the person was vaccinated for H1N1 and “within days” was hospitalised. Dorey writes:
She tried to ask the staff if this could be related to the flu vaccine and they all insisted that there was no link…. This link has been known since 1976 when the flu vaccine was first brought into disrepute…. For staff today to be either so ignorant of this link or, even worse, to lie about it and cover it up, is unforgivable.
She finishes off by reminding readers that this is why the AVN exists. So, why you may ask. To publish without checking facts? To spread fear? To make up fallacies and draw impossible conclusions? To insinuate wrongdoing? So it would seem. To be sure however, there’s more to her ranting.
After the 2010 Fluvax debacle in which 3.3 per 1000 children suffered seizures, the appalling conduct of manufacturer CSL coupled with the TGA’s poor response to both, Dorey assumed she’d be welcomed with open arms. Only a year earlier she let Judy Wilyman loose to tell an audience that, “We’re being educated by the media who have pharmaceutical interests”. Time and again Wilyman claimed the media, as part of the Government, Pharma, Media triad, “run fear campaigns” such as “reporting the deaths of three babies from ‘flu”. In this way the community are “coerced into vaccinating”.
The Fluvax issue was why “hundreds of families” as Dorey claimed this year had children in hospital. Comparing all media reports it appears 23 were hospitalised, 47 taken to hospital and over 60 children effected. This is a serious matter deserving it’s own post to sort the concerns from the hysteria. Meryl made – and still makes – incorrect claims about the suspension in 2010 of paediatric flu vaccines by Australia’s chief medical officer.
She claims that parents were unaware their children were being used in a secret trial. As serious as the W.A. event was, this in no way gives Dorey an excuse to be libellous, falsely suggesting that:
[No] parent who gave permission for their precious child to be vaccinated in this campaign was informed that their babies were being used as guinea pigs in a trial that was paid for by the drug companies involved.
Being welcomed as some anti-vaccine Messiah with a magical carpet bag was not exactly how things flowed. Cathy O’Leary, medical editor for The West Australian reminded readers of how much trouble the AVN was in and brought up the “rape with full penetration” analogy to vaccination that Meryl strongly stood by at the time. The article included:
Australian Medical Association WA president Dave Mountain said the group was trying to whip up anti-vaccine hysteria again.
“They are zealots who pick and choose bits of information to make it look like they’re presenting real evidence,” he said. This led to parents refusing to get children and themselves vaccinated, which affected everyone, particularly the most vulnerable who benefited from herd immunity and, in that respect, they were a danger.
Liberal party member and Federal Member for Kalgoorlie, Barry Haase wrote a piece in The Kimberly Page on immunisation and the impact of the AVN. He noted:
Recent reports state the Australian Vaccination Network, an anti-vaccine lobby group; have been holding meetings in Western Australia. I find it illogical that sane parents would pay $15 to hear why they should not save the lives of their children.
For some, obscure to me, reason, this group has a snout on about saving lives. Vaccination has all but wiped out a number of childhood illnesses.
This radical group, based at Bangalow, near, of course, Byron Bay, was stripped of its charity status by the NSW Office of Liquor, Gaming and Racing, after health authorities found its information to be biased.
This led to an opinion piece in The Kimberly Page from Ken McLeod, who has had his complaint against the AVN upheld resulting in a NSW HCCC order for the group to publish web site warnings. The HCCC have further published their own public health warning about the Australian Vaccination Network. Ken has also been instrumental in urging the OLGR to pursue the AVN over what became 23 legislative breaches.
As already noted here another W.A. article quoted Dorey as admitting to pro bono legal help in her appeals against the HCCC and OLGR. This raises more questions of what may have happened to pledges or donations secured for legal funds.
Then just recently Cathy O’Leary reported on the fact Consumer Protection is investigating the AVN’s grab for donations in W.A., in light of the OLGR NSW revocation of their charitable fundraising licence.
All in all the Supercalifragilistichomeoprophylaxis W.A. Tour 2011 was a big flop for Meryl Dorey.
Entitled Anti-vaccine lobby back in W.A.the piece is factual and balanced. Which at this point in Dorey’s career heralds disaster for the flat earthers. Today the truth includes a little analogy about vaccination being rape with full penetration and losing charity status for withholding transparency about non medical and antivax information. Schadenfreude aside, what did Cathy write?
An anti-vaccination group that sparked a political row in Perth last year is back in WA charging parents $15 for its public forums. The Australian Vaccination Network held meetings in Busselton and Perth this week and will hold others in Jurien Bay and Geraldton next week. Last year, the Uniting Church in Perth refused to let the NSW group use one of its halls and the State Library came under fire when it let the group use one of its buildings instead.
The NSW Office of Liquor, Gaming and Racing also stripped the group, based at Bangalow near Byron Bay, of its charity status after health authorities found its information was biased and said its website should state that its claims were not medical advice.
Spokeswoman Meryl Dorey attracted criticism this year when she likened a court order for a child to be vaccinated to rape. She wrote on the group’s Facebook site it was “assault without consent and with full penetration” but was forced to apologise after some of her own supporters found the comments offensive. [….]
Dorey summoned her flying monkeys on Facebook and set them to work:
More rabid anti-vaccine safety press from… I would think that the hundreds of families whose children have been hospitalised because of a dangerous flu vaccine might have something to say… Please comment on this page and write a letter to….
Wait, wait, wait. “Hundreds of families whose children have been hospitalised”? Really? This didn’t sound right. I was at the meetup of Vaccine Myths on Tuesday morning and can’t remember seeing any Myth or Lie by the name of Hundreds of hospitalisations or anything remotely similar. I’d been handed a card from head myth, Sir Vaccines Cause Autism. Could he help? I hesitantly dialled the number. A very pleasant voice with a British accent answered.
“Sir Vaccines Cause Autism speaking. How may I be of service?”
Nervously I ventured, “Er… Vaccines Cause Autism, you probably don’t remember me but I met you…”.
“Nonsense! Paul isn’t it? I’ve a rather thrifty ear for voices, old chap. My what a pleasant surprise. I didn’t expect to hear from you until my next incarnation. What can I do for you?”
“Well, I just wanted to check up on the likelihood of a certain porky pie Meryl’s spreading on Facebook about…”,
“About the hundreds of hospitalisations following adverse reactions to the flu vaccine in April 2010, yes old boy?”, he sighed. “Hmmmm, you’re not the first to call. Not the first at all. It’s an absolute disgrace Paul and Dorey is making us all look ridiculous. There’s no-one here by that name at all. Firstly, there appears to have been a total of 23 hospitalisations, reported in WA Today. Twenty Three! Then the ABC reported that 45 children were taken to hospital. This doesn’t mean all were admitted, but I’m happy to go with 45. More to the point it was reported that there were just over 60 children in total who had an adverse reaction across the entire state. My office has received no applications for any new Mythology titles referring to WA and there’s no way we’d approve any new Lies or Myths without prior telling, reporting, retelling and debate…. Just a minute… Oh, Vaccines Contain Mercury says Hello dear fellow, and that he wants to launch a coup. He’s very keen to pass that on.”
“Give him my regards”, I replied. “I noticed he doesn’t trust Meryl. Smart chap. What’s this about approval… do you have an actual process?”
“Of course dear boy, of course. We don’t approve any Myth or Lie – no matter how small – unless they’ve been printed in the media as or within a story or opinion piece, brought up in debates at least 100 times, repeated in social media, online forums or talk-back radio, used in logical fallacies almost daily and make good sense to Mike Adams. Only then do we forward the application to Castle Cockamaymee where the committee meets to discuss the merits of the Myth. We do background checks to make sure there’s no truth at all and all Myths undergo a Working with Idiots check. Occasionally we make some exceptions for material on whale.to. Of course there’s a six month probationary period. Then we consider our Myths fully qualified.
“In fact we have a new Lie on this trip. My Uncle Went Into Hospital For Cancer Treatment And Died Perfectly Healthy or just “Uncle“, as we call him. Meryl has tried him a few times. Very funny chap, very funny. We get a lot of laughs. In cases like this, when Lies can’t even trust the liar, the committee looks into the background of identical Lies being told by others, the size of the Burning Stupid it gives off, and the amount of hilarity generated in evidence based circles. We also calculate the probability of future use and growth based on other factors, such as (in this case) the rise of Mythical Natural Cancer Treatments, use of the Lie by identities like Peter Dingle, distrust of conventional medicine, support from other lies like Medicines Are Toxic and the history of the Lie spontaneously arising in unrelated areas. Of course, Dorey’s Lies are quite pathetic and we’ve never approved a single one Ipso Facto. Perish the thought. Uncle made it through because he has a robust presence across the globe already. In effect Dorey – as always – was simply using him. Does that help at all old bean?”
“That’s tremendous”, I replied. “So I presume all’s going well with the trip apart from this?”
“Well, we can only try”, he answered. “Stiff upper lip and all. We may well have never ever existed, but we do have standards. This type of behaviour is typical from Dorey and it’s exactly what some of the lads predicted. It reflects badly on all of us and shows how little respect Meryl Dorey has for a good, well constructed, fully qualified Myth. Counter-intuitively, we thrive on Burning Stupidity and Dorey’s full of it. We all feel terrific! Our P.R. guys are working flat out, so only time will tell. Anyway dear chap I’m rather busy. There’s a confused looking mother nearby so I’ll need to pop over and completely terrify her. Man I love this job, what? I’ll email over a link to the W.A. Today and ABC pieces from April 23rd 2010. Just a minute… Oh, Vaccines Contain Mercury now says to say Goodbye. Hope I’ve been of some help”.
“Awesome, Sir Vaccines Cause Autism. That’s been very helpful. Hope to catch up again”, I replied. “And congratulations on the Knighthood”, I added.
“Oh, jolly good thank you. Always glad to help Paul, And remember… Vaccines really do cause autism. Bwahahahaha”.
Seasonal flu vaccinations across Australia for children under five have been suspended after 23 children in Western Australia were admitted to hospital with convulsions following their injections. One child, aged 1, remains in a coma in a Perth hospital. [….] More than 60 children around the state may have had adverse reactions to the vaccine, including fevers, vomiting and febrile convulsions – a type of fit brought on by a high fever. [….]
He [WA’s chief public health officer Tarun Weeramanthri] said that since this year’s vaccine program started a month ago, 23 children under the age of 10 had presented to Princess Margaret Hospital with convulsions related to vaccinations they had received less than 12 hours before.
Another 40 convulsion cases had been detected in the past month in children at other metropolitan hospitals and in Bunbury. Doctors are now working to determine how many of those children received the flu vaccine. Aside from the convulsions, affected children were suffering fever and vomiting within 12 hours of their flu shots.
The Western Australian Government has suspended all flu vaccinations for children under five while it investigates a spike in admissions to Princess Margaret Hospital in Perth. The Health Minister, Kim Hames, says 45 children have been taken to hospital suffering high temperatures and febrile convulsions after receiving the vaccination.
Well there it was. In black and white. Dorey’s lie wasn’t even a real lie. It was just a Doreyism. A possible maximum of 45 hospitalisations morphed into “hundreds”. Much like the 21 Vaccine Injury Compensation Program cases for encephalitis and similar injuries magically became “hundreds, possibly thousands” of cases of autism when talking on KOFM radio, last May. I wonder what else Cathy O’Leary had reported:
“I always say to people to go to their doctor and get information but get the other side as well so they can make a real decision about whether to vaccinate,” [Meryl Dorey] said.
Well that’s complete bollocks right there. Dorey never tells people any such thing about visiting doctors. Oh well, I hope people at least take that advice. It certainly isn’t hard to see why The Mythical Realm demand such high standards of their Vaccine Myths.
Australian Medical Association WA president Dave Mountain said the group was trying to whip up anti-vaccine hysteria again. “They are zealots who pick and choose bits of information to make it look like they’re presenting real evidence,” he said.
This led to parents refusing to get children and themselves vaccinated, which affected everyone, particularly the most vulnerable who benefited from herd immunity and, in that respect, they were a danger.
That’s about the size of it. The AVN is certainly a danger. That Dorey claims to have scammed up $1350 for a night of fear mongering is pretty galling. Such as claiming there were “hundreds” of hospitalised children in Perth following the Fluvax debacle. Or as WA’s AMA president Dave Mountain said, “They are zealots who pick and choose bits of information to make it look like they’re presenting real evidence.”
Of course some of Dorey’s servants obeyed her command to harass The West Australian for the quality journalism that may very well have saved children’s lives. Everything written is simply factual but Dorey, outside of her censorship comfort zone, needed her minions to attack the source, not the evidence. I understand AVN members wrote to The West Australian unjustly accusing it of seeking to achieve unquestioning support for vaccination and of purposely misrepresenting members of the AVN. It was suggested certain information, perhaps Ms. Dorey’s claim of vaccination being “rape with full penetration” was only there to encourage readers toward an unfavourable view of the AVN.
The hypocrisy here is breath taking. Dorey told AVN members she’d been contacted by Cathy O’Leary and told her of attendance numbers and how attendees were not being told AVN propaganda “of the downsides” of vaccines by their doctors. Remembering that the NSW Health Care Complaints Commission found the AVN “quotes selectively from research to suggest that vaccination may be dangerous”, it’s not surprising doctors aren’t lying to their patients. Yet Dorey had another falsehood up her sleeve.
Eye witness reports suggested a handful of people attended at Floreat. Dorey herself described the turn out as “smallish”. Still The West Australian was duped by Meryl Dorey and reported:
About 90 people, mostly parents of young children, had attended a forum in Floreat on Tuesday night
Strangely no AVN member complained about that error. Perhaps the only actual error in the story. The Big Pharma conspiracy was raised by one supporter suggesting that The West Australian sought to profit from pharmaceutical companies. AVN member and antivax PhD candidate Judy Wilyman was particularly misguided. Writing to the editor of The West Australian, but mistakenly emailing a copy to just under 100 recipients and thus the internet itself, this letter took on a life of it’s own.
I have a terrible memory but remember spotting it on a website, or public email list or one of those ever changing Facebook threads. Either way it’s here now and that’s all that really matters. I guess I could paraphrase her PhD supervisor Dr. Brian Martin regarding the privacy of a third party when he emailed me in August. “Was it marked confidential?”.
Wilyman launches into conspiracy thinking and blame, giving responsibility for truth a wide berth. It included:
The West Australian has stooped to a new low in investigative journalism… Perpetuating misinformation to achieve the desired response from its readers (unquestioning support for vaccination) is irresponsible reporting. [….] …the name of the AVN is the Australian Vaccination Network and the message this organization is promoting is freedom of choice in vaccination. The editor has purposely misrepresented the parents and health professionals who are members of this organization.
In addition, the article includes unnecessary information that has been used to influence the opinion of readers. [….] Unlike the West Australian, the primary interest of consumers is children’s health and not the profits that can be made from the sponsors of newspapers such as pharmaceutical companies. [….]
Why is the media unable to report accurately about the consumer groups who are asking valid questions about vaccination – a medical procedure. If this is an evidence-based policy and if the government is presenting all the known science on its website, it would not be necessary for parents to form organizations to inform themselves of the science that is not being presented to support this policy.
In the interests of democracy it is time for the West Australian to demonstrate some quality journalism and find out why an increasing number of educated parents are not choosing to vaccinate.
Investigative journalism? Science? Anyway… So The West Australian is in on the Big Pharma Myth? The answer to Brian Martin‘s student’s last query is clear. These groups deal in pseudoscience and deception, placing the health of our community and the lives of children at risk. Only last year Wilyman referred to media reporting of three infant fatalities from influenza as designed to “coerce” readers into vaccination, and that the media “run fear campaigns”. Speaking of “science” she quoted from a hundred year old text and referred to much older material, then rattled off the standard vaccination myths. The ones that science has debunked time and again.
Wilyman told her audience at the State Library in Perth last year.
We’re being educated by the media who have pharmaceutical interests
Really? This is what it comes down to time and again. There’s no evidence to refute vaccine efficacy or their success in changing our quality and length of life. So it must be a plot. Judy Wilyman works hard to mislead Australians. Consider the misleading poster below on Coercive and Mandatory Immunisation. Despite the sub-heading How Ethical is The Policy? and Wilyman’s accusations above including “Perpetuating misinformation to achieve the desired response”, “unnecessary information that has been used to influence the opinion of readers” and intentional misrepresentation the reality is far different. Without vaccination of health care workers patients would be at risk, workers would be at risk and institutions would be at risk of law suits from those who catch a vaccine preventable disease.
Judy Wilyman’s abuse of Murdoch University Logo
Ethics? Judy Wilyman did not have the permission of Murdoch University to use their logo. Then writing an Investigate before you vaccinate brochure for the AVN once again used the good name of Murdoch University. Little wonder she is now at Wollongong University supported by AVN advocate and defender, Brian Martin. Finally despite the support above, travelling interstate and presenting antivaccination material with, writing for and being an active supporter of the AVN, Wilyman publically distances herself from the AVN, denying membership. Perhaps this is true but in reality Judy Wilyman does more to support the AVN than any “member” in history.
The Commission’s investigation established that the AVN:
provides information that is solely anti-vaccination
contains information that is incorrect and misleading
quotes selectively from research to suggest that vaccination may be dangerous.
On this basis, the Commission recommended to the AVN that it should include a statement in a prominent position on its website to the following effect:
The AVN’s purpose is to provide information against vaccination, in order to balance what it believes is the substantial amount of pro-vaccination information available elsewhere.
The information provided by the AVN should not be read as medical advice.
The decision about whether or not to vaccinate should be made in consultation with a health care provider.
The Commission recognises that it is important for there to be debate on the issue of vaccination. However, the AVN provides information that is inaccurate and misleading.
There is no “educated”, informed or as Wilyman claims, “freedom of choice”. Parents are making the mistake not to vaccinate because they are misled by the lies and myths told by antivaccination lobbyists. As the HCCC also stated in the Public Warning, the lies peddled by the AVN such as that presented in W.A. and advanced by Wilyman herself:
…may result in members of the public making improperly informed decisions about whether or not to vaccinate, and therefore poses a risk to public health and safety.
So, the AVN ilk were true to form. Information that is factual and documented was deemed conspiratorial, misleading and wrong. Information that is false was considered fine by AVN supporters. The conspiracy and persecution twaddle is designed to justify why these dangerous risks to public health and innocent children behave as though above the law.
For all her Flying Monkey urging to comment, Dorey’s Facebook command appeared to be quite unsuccessful.
A strange scene unfolded in the pre-dawn hours of Tuesday in a run down hanger on an abandoned air strip just outside of Bungalow NSW. Meryl Dorey was preparing for her Perth seminar, Vaccination: Making the right choice.
All night trucks and vans had been delivering the Myths and Lies Meryl would be using in Perth. Coffins, boxes and sarcophagi had been brought in and stacked strategically around the hanger. Containing the non existent and the long dead mummified remains of the most faithful vaccination myths, all that remained was to bring them back to life with the power of Burning Stupid.
Clad in hobnailed boots and a paramilitary uniform Dorey held aloft a copy of Living Wisdom from August 2008 filled with requests for donations to a fictitious Fighting Fund. With such blatant lies that had worked so well, the Burning Stupid crackled and sparked upon the pages of this near sacred text. Dorey intoned the Restoration Spell at times flinging open a page with an ad’ for colloidal silver or immune boosting herbs, while the heavens boomed and thundered. The few journalists who had bothered to come crept a bit closer.
Double, double toil and trouble, I recall ye myths back from argument rubble
For we shall say again with bland impunity, That vaccination gives not immunity
Toxins and metals. They’ve never been tested, And natural disease has never been bested
Autism, cot death, high pitched crying, And fetal cells with our interminable lying
Sanitation, fresh food and clean running water, is all ye need for viral slaughter
And we shall charge them an entrance fee, To claim all vaccines contain MERCURY!
As Dorey intoned “Mercury” a loud crack rang throughout the hanger and the heavens clouded over with menacing clouds. At the same time the lid shot off one of the coffins and a very dead very mummified corpse sat up clad in some type of armour clutching a sword. Reporters recognised him from the battle of Castle Mamamia as the powerful Myth Vaccines Contain Mercury.
He glared at Meryl and said, “I thought we agreed last time we’d change it to Sanitation, fresh food and clean running water, is all ye need or all ye oughta? I mean, seriously who’s gunna keep fallin’ for vaccine slaughter? Even the allopaths don’t go that far, not to mention treading on the toes of Natural Immunity. You just wait ’till Improved Living Standards comes ’round and he’ll agree, you’ll see. I sometimes wonder if you even know what you’re doing woman. The parsnip lady would never go that far. I mean you are just so, so full of bollocks it staggers me and comin’ from a long dead myth that’s really sayin’ somethin’ that is. The idea is to lie to ’em not treat ’em like complete fools. An’ what’s with that last line? It makes me look responsible for stealing their hard earned money, an’ that’s your doin’ that is, not mine.
“I mean, we might be liars, murderers and bringers of pestilence but a man’s earnings are rightly his, an’ I ‘aint no thief, no Sir. An’ I suppose you’ll be asking for donations too eh? Yeah? Blimey you’re pathetic Dorey, just pathetic. Money, money, money. Got another Fighting Fund in the makings ‘ave we? Help ya out in court maybe? Ooooh. Aaaaah. They’re suppressing my right to speak. Whaaah. Yeah right. Forgotten where we’re headed today have we? You’re gunna parade us Lies and Myths up and down the Boulevard Centre in Perth with… what was it again..? Oh yeah, Impunity. Impunity!? Hardly suppression of the right to free speech Meryl, blimey. Just remember we made you Dorey, not the other way around. I’m going out for a reefer if anyone cares to join me”.
With that he headed for the doorway mimicking Dorey’s duck bum walk reciting her spell in a high pitched tone. Before Dorey could open her mouth a polite round of applause broke out from the ever increasing crowd of Mummy’s, Myths and Corpses roused from stasis in part by Dorey’s spell but perhaps more completely by Vaccines Cause Mercury‘s speech. After all, it had been a contentious issue this trip with many Lies and Myths voting against helping out Dorey at all.
Her self pity, cries of oppression, outright criminality and the inability to tolerate dissenting comments was enough in itself. Yet falling under the spell of this Brian Martin chap who was rorting the entire Vaccination Myth empire for his own gain with cowardly and underhanded tactics was an affront to chivalry. Now here, her prancing about in a paramilitary suit just seemed to confirm everything.
Always the quintessential gentleman with impeccable manners learned from his time at the Royal Free Hospital and within the pages of The Lancet Vaccines Cause Autism strode out from behind his sarcophagus. “Yes, yes we thank my good friend Vaccines Contain Mercury for the light entertainment. Always unpredictable after a long rest. But of course we thank our hostess for bringing us here, Ms. Meryl Dorey Australia’s foremost expert on vaccination”, he managed with a flourish which was met with muttering guffaws and the odd clap. Someone may have farted.
Vaccines Cause Autism shot a quick glare in the direction of the offending noise. Having taken the time for a quick snoop, he continued without missing a beat, “Now there’s coffee and tea towards the front, fresh sandwiches and wraps over to the side, vegetarian a bit further along and vaccinated infants and children hanging in cages above each table. Do keep in mind you have absolutely no effect on them so let’s try to not get sidetracked like the debacle over at Jim Carrey’s back in 2008. Any questions so far”?
“What’s that awful smell”?, asked Vaccines Haven’t Been Tested.
“I’m… I’m not feeling very well”, answered Improved Living Standards Wiped Out Vaccine Preventable Disease.
“No, that’s not it”, chimed in Vaccines Contain Toxins, “I can smell it too. It’s worse than that new Lie over there, My Uncle Went Into Hospital For Cancer Treatment And Died Perfectly Healthy – and he’s still decomposing”. Vaccines Cause Autism chatted quietly with Meryl for a moment.
“That’s Nimbin”, he announced. “Slight North Westerly breeze this morning chaps. Awfully sorry what, but let’s just get on with the task at hand. Tally Ho and all. We may be dead, decomposing and mummified but Nimbin residents have a power we can only dream of”. The crowd mumbled it’s grudging admiration. Vaccines Cause Disease giggled in his usual insane manner.
Without warning, Improved Living Standards collapsed. “Medic!”, screamed Meryl Dorey. No-one moved. The sound of crickets could be heard coming from the long grass outside. One of the Myths mumbled quietly to Dorey. “New Age Wellness Volunteers!”, she yelled. Suddenly the hanger was bustling. There was Reiki, Reflexology, Quantum Healing, Succussing, Diluting, Succussing, Diluting… and herbs. By golly there were herbs. Cries rose above the din. “Ear candles!”… “Acupuncture needles!”… “Positive vibes”… “Cosmic consciousness”…
“What’s wrong with him?” cried a homeopath.
“He doesn’t exist”, came the reply.
“Perfect!” responded the excited homeopath. “You”, he cried pointing at a Reiki guru with his chin. “Take this phial of nothing and dissolve it in this beaker of water with more nothing”.
“You just did that 1400 times already”, replied the Guru.
“Fool! It just looked like nothing. One day quantum physics will explain it, but we don’t have time to wait. Now pour, shake, succuss, empty and repeat 1000 times. Speed is of the essence”.
“Did someone call for essence?”, cried the Aromatherapist, who reporters confirm smelt absolutely gorgeous. They continued this way for an hour or more. Eventually some New Age weirdo looked up and explained. “It’s useless… it’s the Mamamia article. It’s been shared countless times on Facebook, emailed across the globe, retweeted again and again and again. With Hib vaccine success between 1993 and 2005 no-one believes in this Myth.
“Judy Wilyman does”, announced Dorey. “You know… PhD Judy!” The assembled crowd stared, blinked, shook their heads and sighed deeply. Improved Living Standards faded away to dust in the absence of any belief. Dorey tried hard but the possibility of profit and media attention filled her head.
During the futility of reviving a Myth the other Myths had backed away. This could happen to any of them. In fact, it regularly did. Which is why they remained partially optimistic. Hoping to brighten the mood Diseases Are Harmless looked at Vaccines Cause Autism. “Don’t you have something to say?”, he asked grinning suspiciously.
“Oh yes”, answered Vaccines Cause Autism. “A big welcome to our newest Lie, My Uncle Went Into Hospital For Cancer Treatment And Died Perfectly Healthy. He’s likely to get a run if things go quiet so make him feel at home”. A cheer went up and some back slapping ensued. All agreed their freshly decomposing friend would be best off known as just Uncle.
“Not that”, urged Diseases Are Harmless nodding at a shiny new ring on Vaccines Cause Autism’s finger. “Don’t be shy now”.
“Well, I wasn’t going to make a fuss…”. The crowd looked on expectantly and Vaccines Cause Autism was clearly embarrassed. “Oh well chaps if you insist. As vulgar as I find self promotion, I guess it’s in everyone’s interest… I was Knighted for services to the Realm of Mythology in sustaining the Power of The Burning Stupid. I suppose they reasoned if anyone was stupid enough to keep coming back time and again when he clearly doesn’t exist, then why not annoy him by making his name a bit longer”. A great cheer went up and arms, legs and heads were thrown into the air in celebration. A few verses of “For He’s A Jolly Good Myth” followed.
“Now, now”, Vaccines Cause Autism went on. “I myself argued there are much older myths more worthy of a title. Improved Living Standards for example is, or presently was, a generation older than I. Vaccines Contain Toxins was out and about terrifying innocent people back in the 1930’s with stories of puss and blood. Whilst Diseases Are Harmless is a senior amongst seniors”, he added raising his sword in a gentlemanly salute, ‘”Not to forget Vaccines Contain Mercury without whom I would never have gotten started. My old friend Vaccines Contain Monkey Kidney Cells also has quite a history. I say, Monk old chap what’s happened!?”
“I’m only half a myth these days lads”, replied Vaccines Contain Monkey Kidney Cells, crawling legless across the floor. “Never mind, I chip in where I can. The Parsnip woman mentioned me on 60 Minutes a while back. Most invigorating”.
“That’s the spirit that’s sustained me chaps! Not only is he a myth today, he’s never even existed. We should all take a leaf out of his book”, intoned Vaccines Cause Autism.
“Yes but you’ve done the most damage by far and been shown to not exist most thoroughly”, added Vaccines Haven’t Been Tested. “Even that law firm paid that no-longer-a-doctor chap who stood to gain by using you and a bum disorder to make money from so-called treatment and also filed patents for a mono-what’s it vaccine, has been crucified man. And the paper he fraudulated got with-tracted.”
“Ahem”, began Vaccines Cause Autism looking for all the world like a professor. “A few corrections. The ‘bum disorder’ or disorders you speak of are Ileal-lymphoid-nodular hyperplasia and non-specific colitis, to be more accurate. The paper that was retracted from The Lancet was titled Ileal-lymphoid-nodular hyperplasia, non-specific colitis, and pervasive developmental disorder in children and was indeed fraudulent. It is still cited as accurate by crackpots such as dear Meryl over there and adds considerably to my mythical powers as part of my hectic schedule entails being Vaccines CausePervasive Developmental Disorder In Children. Yes, the chap, Andrew Wakefield if I recall, did stand to make a great deal of money from keeping me captive to serve his own purposes and he did file a patent for a monovalent vaccine. A beastly man with an appalling ego, would you believe he is also worshipped by our friend Dorey who insists he will one day be vindicated?” Laughter.
“It’s all a bit academic now, this trivalent MMR vs monovalent shots business. I say, hard to believe I began my first assignments as MMR Causes Autism, what? Ghastly chaps, just ghastly. Imagine if all I’d achieved was to scare people into thinking just one lot of shots caused autism, and the only one to benefit would have been a stuffy British crook hired by a stuffy British legal team. My powers of course, have since expanded exponentially – especially since I joined up with you chaps under the Realm Of Mythology. I could not have done it without my best and most loyal friend, Vaccines Contain Mercury, who is just as entitled to a knighthood as any Myth I’ve known. No braver Myth would I choose to have at my side. Only after years together was I able to expand from MMR causes autism, to the number of shots causes autism to now… well, pretty much any vaccine causes autism. Ha! Three cheers for human stupidity!”. The crowd cheered.
“Did I hear my name?”, came a muffled response from Vaccines Contain Mercury who had found the refreshment table and was shovelling in sandwiches by the handful, enjoying them immensely. “We can’t take any contraband so…”, he shrugged his shoulders, handing out what was left of his stash to his fellow Myths.
“Oh, rather! Just saying what a loyal and fast friend and Myth you’ve been dear chap”, Vaccines Cause Autism replied.
Always quick on his feet, Vaccines Contain Mercury winked, “I see you’ve told them then… Sir”, he grinned. Then, “Well I say lads, he should be havin’ none of this Dorey woman who would hand our new knight of The Realm back to Wakefield in handcuffs if she could. They’re just usin’ us. We always cop a decent hiding in her hands. They can’t frame their arguments to keep us going for long. And they’re weird. Who’s that Gollum looking guy on a leash by Dorey’s side?”
“That’s Andrew MacDonald”, quietly offered Diseases Are Harmless. “Keep ya distance. Mad as two hens on a honeymoon. He’s the guy who wrote to parents who’d lost a baby to a vaccine preventable disease, saying… get this, that God chose the baby for this purpose. The baby hadn’t been vaccinated, but he starts using us myths in this rambling abuse”.
“What the…?”, Vaccines Haven’t Been Tested cursed as Vaccines Cause Disease shrieked and leaped about on all fours ready to devour MacDonald. Even My Child’s Immune System Will Be Overwhelmed, usually a timid pathetic little myth was on his feet swearing and peering toward this Andrew MacDonald character. Voices were raised in agreement that God was off limits. Unprovable either way. Known for their tolerance, Vaccine Myths themselves are multi-faith and of no faith.
Diseases Are Harmless continued. “He reckons that people who use vaccines must by definition think God is not perfect. That they must think God forgot to add toxic heavy metals, pig cells and chicken cells ‘found in vaccines’ to people. He goes on to claim research, not Myths, support the choice not to vaccinate”. With a roar Vaccines Contain Mercury was on his feet sword at the ready.
“I’ll kill him myself. How dare he tamper with my ontology! He places us all at risk. I decide how I’m used in tormenting humans – not stupid humans themselves. Research? Bah! There is no research to support antivax arguments, only us Myths. Without constant retelling as Myths we face potential doom. I have an analogue in that some vaccines contain ethyl mercury. Thus, I volunteer to skewer the critter. WTF do you think will happen if we allow insane humans to begin to voice their own myths? I told you this Dorey was bad news. First the disgraced physicist, Brian Martin – now this lunatic. It’s simple exploitation. We are all more powerful than her. Without us, she is nothing! Nothing! I say we waste the bastard”.
A large muscular Myth whose face was hidden was standing nearby. It was Big Pharma. “You don’t think that’s hasty? This thing may be of use to us. I mean, chicken cells, pig cells? Ha! They aren’t even here. They are ex-Myths. Clearly MacDonald is regarded as a fool by human standards. Thus he has no power over Myths beyond incoherent insanity. The lack of retelling led to the demise of Chicken cells and Pig cells years ago. He cannot revive them. His story sounds like rubbish even to us Myths. Surely we can torment him simply for satisfaction. For practice”.
Diseases Are Harmless cleared his throat. “Big Pharma, he also asked these parents if they had so much faith in you outstripping God do they not doubt you at all. Or something… he’s clearly insane and it’s hard to…”.
“Blasphemy!”, thundered Big Pharma drawing his sword, assuming a battle position. “That’s settled then. We waste the bastard! Slowly”. There was vigorous agreement.
“I say we take off and nuke the site from orbit”, offerred Vaccinated Kids Get The Disease. Everyone turned to look at him. “Sorry, I’ve just always wanted to say that”.
“Gentlemen, gentlemen, gentlemen. And monkey and ladies”, interrupted Vaccines Cause Autism nodding suavely toward the few blushing ladies who had recently joined as Lies about high pitched screaming, disturbed sleep and fever caused by vaccination years after the event. “Surely we can agree on an accommodation that will suit us in general and solve this particularly repugnant revulsion known as Andrew MacDonald. I say we play along with our hobnailed friend over there. Take full advantage of the refreshments and Stupid on offer.
“Partake of Vaccines Contain Mercury‘s herbs – the only ones here that do what they claim to (laughter) – and then enjoy a most invigorating, splendid regeneration as old Dopey parades us about in Perth, what? We are above this AVN train wreck, and we don’t even exist! Her time is almost over. We shall abandon her when it suits us. Or when she starts groping for money. Whatever comes first. Then move on to better things. Before that however, there is Burning Stupid galore so I urge to enjoy your fill. If perchance, MacDonald is harmed in the process, burned by his own Stupid or dies of influenza you have a Knight of The Realm to vouch for your innocence. Does that not make sense?”
Another cheer and the crowd dispersed to enjoy the rejuvenation.
“Fancy a stroll to take in the morning air”, Vaccines Cause Autism asked Vaccines Contain Mercury. “I hear the breeze is no longer coming from Nimbin”.
“Care to partake?” tempted Mercury with a large reefer.
“Why not? You only live 764,842 times… so far”, joked Autism.
“Remember Smoking Is Good For You?”, asked Mercury wistfully.
“I often think of him. A dear friend sadly missed. You know, we shall outlive a few of those here today but ultimately….”.
“Yes, ultimately we too will cease to exist… forever. Say, if I happen to accidentally stub out this roach on the back of Andrew MacDonald’s neck, would…er…?”
“Would anything happen? Why no, my friend – you don’t even exist”, replied Autism with a grin.
“Repugnant Revulsion? You actually said Repugnant Revulsion?”
“Did you like it? I thought it was rather fitting”.
“Well, I had a few ideas myself. But with the ladies present…. and a Knight of The Realm also… Sir”, answered Mercury.
Vaccines Cause Autism let out an audible groan.
And so it was, two chuckling dear old friends, Vaccines Cause Autism and Vaccines Contain Mercury, more aware of their own non-existent mythical status than the predatory human antivaxer about to put them to use, shot her a withering glare of disgust and strolled out into the morning air.
Andrew MacDonald trapped in a prison of his own making, chewed on his leash.
Myths like…”.
Meryl either agreed that she was indeed “proved wrong” or was simply unable to offer a cogent reply. She ignored every point and answered:
Tracey responds, yet strangely her comment still awaits moderation. The perpetual complainer of free speech suppression is still, as ever, hard at work censoring the truth. Tracey has generously mentioned my first request of Dorey.
Losing In The Lucky Country 